Ok, maybe I got just a slight boner off this...
Here’s Sandy Bullock making her second (she appeared at some guys’ awards show that isn’t as popular first) public appearance since her Nazi went and found his ass a new Eva Braun at the MTV Movie Awards last night.
Here’s the clip:
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So she wants normalcy. Can’t blame her. Also, Betty White makes ovary jokes. Even better. Can Betty White just talk about her inner workings at every awards show? I would much rather hear about her downstairs at length than ever see Kristen Stewart’s grouch ass again.
Sandy IS class. Because I would have gotten up there and discussed everything from Jesse James’ butt acne to that Nazi hooker’s Easy Bake gas chamber for Jews in her basement. I would have gone off on penis size, breath, how he married me for money, how she obviously came out of a crack pipe, etc. There woulda been a big fucking reckoning on that stage. Ryan Reynolds would have cried into his abs a little from the ferocity. But Sandy doesn’t play it that way. (Although I liked when she asked Scarjo why she was there. It’s sort of what I ask about her when I see her in flicks except Ghost World and well, see the last paragraph).
I really love her. Her movies are eh, but good to go see with RiRi Harvey or watch while hungover on a Saturday afternoon before leaving to get drunk again. She just radiates America. And when I say America, I mean laid back, good people who just want to do their job and live their life and get along. Do you know what I’m saying?
Ok, granted, she is up there mostly because people feel bad for her that the thug she married ended up with every Neo-Nazi hosebag and tattoo parlor taxi dancer slut in this hemisphere. And she has more money than God. I am such a naive douche, she probably has the best PR person and media coach money can buy. Who am I kidding? She probably keeps slaves.
Oh, and as you will see – Sandy plants one on Scarjo. I felt absolutely nothing, but then again, I want to see Joey Fatone make out with the cute guy from Stargate Universe. I don’t watch that show. I just know there’s a cute guy and I don’t mean Richie Valens or the psycho from Trainspotting.
Oh, say hey and by the way. I know Iron Man 2 was a letdown for a lot of bitches. But that scene in which Scarjo spider defeats every gunman in the building was so very hot. I would actually buy the DVD to watch that one again and again. It almost (but not quite) reached the level of the Hit Girl in the library hallway with the guns scene for me. I am nerd, hear me roar.
p.s. Reader Christo supplied me with this gem. God, I look amazing. You know I already own that get-up.
J. Harvey make good sexy Russian superspy, no?