Posts Tagged ‘Temp Diary’

Temp Diary, Day 7 – Snapshots

March 10, 2015


The company I am temping for has a branch that is specifically for training new employees. This is where I am based.


Temp Diary, Day 2: Phones and How My Temping Experience Is Unlike That Of Melanie Griffith In “Working Girl”

March 6, 2015


Sigourney Weaver hasn’t told me to rethink┬áthe jewelry yet. So there’s that. In other news, that hairstyle doesn’t just crest out of one’s head by itself, let me tell you!

Harrison Ford just crashed his plane, so he’s not available for me to bang my way to an office. Actually, I DO have an office. I share it with the scanner and the paper shredder. But it is my own little area to rue the day and what not, even if people are coming in to shred documents that I can almost guarantee no one gives a whit about. Unless someone is embezzling or something. Hopefully. It would add a little color to this desolate corporate wasteland.

Here’s another daily detriment to my dignity. Phones. I occasionally have to “cover the phones.” Now, “covering the phones” and I are not as strangers. In my often odd job history in which I have circumnavigated the typical job track, I have worked as an office manager-type. It was fine. Working with sales people can be trying seeing as they’re a different breed of human and often need scourging. But in general, no problem. Unless you’ve got Ursula the Sea Bitch for a superior and she drives you back to therapy because of all the evil and spite that burst from her womb outward, exiting from her dirtbag mouth…where was I? Right, phones.


Temp Diary Day 1

March 6, 2015


“Ok, so I should just get Jason set up on Outlook?”

“Um, no, no. I don’t think he needs that.”

I don’t RATE E-MAIL. I will be working WITHOUT E-MAIL. There are individuals who work at public pools who STAMP HANDS for a living that are given e-mail.

I was also denied a Citrix login. I vaguely recall what Citrix is, but it doesn’t bear the same sting as BEING DENIED E-MAIL AT A PLACE OF BUSINESS WHERE YOU WILL BE PERFORMING OFFICE TASKS FOR THEM THAT GENERALLY REQUIRE COMMUNICATION.

Hi! I’m a temp!